Deviant Advice

Hey Deviant Advice

OMG this rseshun is horrible. But I got myself covered. There’s a man I know who say he wants to be my sugar daddy. My girl says it’s like I’m a ho. What do y’alls think?

-BJ, Detroit
You know. The fact that your initials are “BJ” is going to make me spend hours giggling like a high school prom queen (seriously, it’s adorable. -ed). But you’re not here for that, you’re here for advice. How’s about we get down to it.

But first.. it’s “recession” ok? Thanks.

And that also pretty much tells me that a Sugar Daddy is about the ONLY way you’re going to make any serious money in life. Now, unless this guy is freakishly wealthy and just feels the need to donate to some random stranger (ha!), then you’re likely doing something for this cash. So, BJ (teehee), that does make you a ho. Sorry, but them’s the breaks.

Now. Should you care? FUCK NO. This guy probably isn’t wanting anything major out of you.. unless he’s sent you a coffee cup and asked if you have any friends. In that case, get out of there as fast as you can. Otherwise, who cares? So you either send him dirty pics, send him dirty underwear, sing him “Dirty Laundry,” or something else similarly disgusting. In return, he pays your bills. Honestly, this is economics in it’s purest form. It’s his money, might as well let him spend it however the hell he wants. Food, family, a ghetto princess from Detroit, whatever. And if you have the good looks that can pay the bills, then you should use it to your full advantage.

Oh sure, some people are going to call you a ho and going to say that what you’re doing is wrong, but hey… who eats better? Am I right here? Damn straight I am. And that’s why you write in, people.

So BJ, you go on with your bad-ass self. And if he ever asks, we could sure use a couple bucks ourselves…