Deviant Advice

To: badadviceforgoodpeople@gmail.com
From: XXX@well.com
Subject: hipsters and hatred

Hello.

I do hope that this email finds you well. I wanted to write a brief note and let you know that I was absolutely apalled by your recent article on Hipsters. It’s tragic that you have to pick on people such as these simply because they have the compunction to dress differently than what I’m presuming you dress. These people are free-thinkers and risk-takers and will potentially be part of a new revolution in humanity. What have YOU done?

Ok. so the fact that you actually have a well.com address is adorable and all, but it really means jack-all to me. Sure, at some point there was a certain coolness to it and it was actually relevant. Now? Well, I’m pretty sure that *I* could get a Well address. Oh wait, if I pony up $7 a month, I can get one!

Now that I’ve ripped your credibility to little tiny pieces, let’s get on to your email.

You see, I make fun of people like hipsters (and gays, the religious, blacks, whites, women, men, disabled, differently abled, nerds, geeks, jocks, and anything with a pulse really) because it’s just plain fun and, honestly, people like it. Sure, I can be a bit mean and acerbic, but I take as good as I get. I mean, I publish the hate mail don’t I? Sure, I toss in the occasional love mail, but generally it’s the hate mail that gets prime featuring. Plus I do it on Monday, the one day that most folks can truly use a pick-me-up. See how nice I am? Awww. Yup, I’m just a cuddly little thang, ain’t I?

As far as hipsters being some sort of vanguards of humanity or whatever, no. Not a damn bit. They’re called “hipsters” because they chase after any fad that seems hot and potentially ironic at the time. They don’t think for themselves, it’s pure groupthink. So of course these people aren’t really going to be on the cutting edge of anything, yet somehow being on the idiot edge of everything. And a new revolution in humanity? The hell is THAT about? I really have no idea what you’re talking about. These are people who will pay $150 for a Nintendo t-shirt and $6 for a PBR tallboy. If they’re doing anything, it’s to set economics back about 100 years by having no damned clue what money really is. Honestly.

As far as what have I done? Well, you see this site right? Yup, my own two hands full o’ fingers and my big brain full of ideas. I’ve taken what was a funky little concept and bloomed it into a cottage industry while spending absolutely zilch on advertising. To be honest, I think that’s quite a feat. Granted, this is just a snarky-ass blog.. but hey, looks like some folks from The Well surf here and that’s gotta mean something…