So “New Moon,” the newest movie installment of the “Twilight” book series is out. And that sound you hear is the simultaneous orgasmic throes of 40-old housewives across the country squealing like 14-year olds… which is actually the audience that “Twilight” is aimed for. So with that in mind, we present our honest, no-holds-barred review of “New Moon”…
*** WARNING: SPOILERS! Yes, I tell you that you will waste your life watching this movie…***
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Hey folks. As the resident advice-giving nerd around these here parts, sometimes the duty of doing various reviews does fall to me. Seriously, it’s not always about giving you advice that proves utterly useless.
So, yesterday, Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen opened up in theaters. No, I haven’t seen it. I caught Transformers on opening day, so I feel I have enough qualifications to do a movie review based entirely off a combination of the previous movie and random crap I pull off the internet… plus I was that one guy who actually liked Armageddon (deal with it, k?). So with that, I’m dividing this review into two sections…
WARNING: May contain spoilers… unless you have an IQ over 12. (more…)
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